SANTA CLARA MEDITATION RELATIONSHIP IMPROVEMENT – HOW CAN I, AS AN INTROVERT, ENJOY BEING WITH PEOPLE MORE?
I have a lot of sympathy for this question, I could find an effective solution to this question, and I’d like to share my experience as a meditator about how I could change myself.
I was on the introverted side. So I couldn’t express my opinion well in a situation when I had to express my opinion. Because I was afraid of having a conflict with the other. I have been too afraid to be hurt. So I always smiled on the outside, but inside of my mind, I always felt uncomfortable with people. Therefore, I couldn’t enjoy the time with people.
I wanted to say what I want to say, but it was hard for me. Because when I went in front of the other, I was so afraid to face a situation where people would hate me or feel uncomfortable. Whoever I’m with, I was busy reading other countenance, and I couldn’t help myself. So I had a lot of shame and regret not being able to say exactly what I need to saying. So for me, human relationships were difficult.
Because of those kinds of reasons, I had a huge interest in changing my introverted character and looked for ways to get along with people well.🔍
So I’ve tried to force myself to act confident and pretended to be bright. I’ve worn a mask. However, the more I pretend, the more unnatural my behavior became. I’ve hated myself for not being able to tell my opinion naturally and not enjoying being with people comfortably.
But now I could express my opinion naturally and can be comfortable with people. Regardless of my introverted personality, I was able to treat people comfortably and could enjoy the time with people. The way I could change myself was through meditation. Through meditation, what I did was, could reflect on myself deeply and precisely and let go of my mind.
When I reflect on myself🧘♀️, there was a decisive memory that I found. It was the memory of my father. When I was young, I often got scolded by my father whenever I acted against his standards. So I had become a habit of reading my dad’s countenance. Those kinds of stories about my dad were deeply rooted in my mind. So I was obsessed with not being scolded, not being hurt by others. In the same manner, because of my rooted mind, I couldn’t express my opinion easily. So I let go of all these rooted minds about my father one by one.
Letting go of these minds really made me free from the compulsion and gradually felt so comfortable. As such minds were emptied, lacking confidence and avoiding people, and being alienated from conversation disappeared naturally. I found myself enjoying the time with people without inconvenience. It was amazing.
THROUGH MEDITATION, I REALIZED THAT ALL THE REASON COMES FROM THE MIND THAT I’VE POSSESSED, AND IT WAS REALLY GREAT TO SEE MYSELF CHANGING AS MUCH AS I THREW THE ROOT OF MINDS AWAY.
The way getting along with people well is not by force to change one’s personality or pretend, but when my mind is emptied and becomes a true mind within and when there is no negative mind, then we can enjoy and get along with people naturally and we can truly be happy whatever we do. All the solutions and answers are already within me. 🙏
by Ellen Park
