Santa Clara Meditation Repentance – Finding the Reason and Purpose Of Life For The First Time
Steven Foster / San Jose, California
I have always lived an aimless life. From a very early age, I wanted to make a lot of money. So, after finishing graduate school, I started a lot of businesses and failed. I always wanted to settle down. But every time I would start to settled down, I would see another possible business opportunity and change my business plan again and again and then, finally, I would fail once more. I repeated this cycle 4 or 5 times. Eventually, I became so exhausted from trying and just wanted to die. That’s when I found this meditation.
I discovered meditation through the internet and the reviews were good and it was close to where I lived so I decided to go visit. When I went there, the meditation guide was kind and warm to me and explained the meditation method in very simple terms. I have never practiced meditation before, so I thought it would be difficult for me to follow along, but I soon found out that after meditating 1-2 times, this meditation was not difficult at all. Rather, my mind became comfortable and I found this meditation practice to be very interesting. It was actually fun for me and it seemed like it was helping, so I took the time every day to go meditate, even though I was very busy.
Meditation is the study of how to throw away the mind. I was able to reflect on my past life through this method. I also found out why I was aimless and why I couldn’t concentrate on one business.
When I was young, my parents’ love just wasn’t enough. I would come home from school to find my parents fighting every day. It was only natural that my family couldn’t find peace because we didn’t have a healthy relationship with each other. I had watched my parents fight every day due to their differences in opinion. So I was looking for any place in my life where others would accept me. I decided to attend church. But my aimless personality struck again. I didn’t attend just one church. I went from church to church changing every month, every week, because I had to meet as many people as possible and wanted to be recognized, loved, and trusted by people. I liked the people who accepted me and treated me with warmth, but I wouldn’t even look at anyone who wasn’t genuinely accepting me. So, it was only fitting that I was always looking for something more. I wanted to be successful in business and I wanted others to recognize me.
The more I practiced this meditation, the more I realized that, in order to succeed in a business, it takes time and a steady effort. I needed to learn patience when things weren’t going well. Sometimes, my business plan may not work out, but then, as time passes, my efforts accumulate and that leads to a positive result. I was unable to succeed because all I really cared about was recognition and quick success. Jumping from business to business wasn’t working.
I could also see that I’d been looking for somebody – not just any anybody. I was looking for one person who could accept and love me and wanted to always be with me as my best friend. Everyone was good to me but there has never been that one person in my life who would provide this type of lasting relationship in my 50 years.
As I reflected on my life through this meditation, I realized that my loneliness was my fault and it was because of my mentality. I wanted to get recognized for the things I’d done, but I wasn’t willing to put in the effort to really get any success. That’s why my businesses were constantly failing. I had the wrong mindset. I blamed the world for my problems. Why was the world so unfair to me? When I finally saw that everything was my fault, I had no choice but to let go of all of my old thinking.
After I’d learned this valuable lesson from my meditation, I could see that I was the cause of all of my unhappiness. I slowly made changes in my life. I’ve heard a lot of people say that now I am more serious and sincere since I began to meditate. Even after only 2 months of meditating, people began to see the changes. And I can now see the changes too. I know that this is just the start but I really want to live better and stop wandering around in my mind.
Now I can honestly say that I’ve found the reason and purpose of life for the first time. Once I found the unchanging True mind and the unchanging God within me, I am no longer aimless. So I no longer have to wander back and forth in search of love, recognition, and success. I am so grateful to the founders of this meditation. This meditation works and everyone should do it. Today I am heading to the meditation center to let go of the old me. I don’t wander anymore and I have found the reason and purpose of life.
