Santa Clara Meditation Repentance – Having The Wisdom To Resolve Conflict Through Meditation
Kyung-hee Lee / Governor of the National Health Insurance Corporation
There was a fellow female employee whom I hated for more than a decade. I tried to control my mind somehow, but it didn’t work. I was only able to apologize to the employee and say, “I’m so sorry to think about how much I hurt you,” after realizing that it really was all ‘my fault.’
A proud personality with much friction among colleagues
That employee was very surprised. Since my meditation, my relationships with others have improved greatly. More than anything else, I felt very comfortable with myself as I my hatred for others disappeared. This happened only a month after I started meditation. While working with others, I have had many conflicts in maintaining relationships. Always having a strong opinion and arguing with others, I constantly challenged and destroyed the self-esteem of others, which has led to a lot of friction and quarreling with my colleagues.
While meditating, I found that it was myself who was to blame for all the problems in my relationships. It was because of my strong pride and my self-centered thinking that only I was correct. As I threw that self away, I became more and more soft-tempered and was able to control my temper and impatience. Naturally, my relationships with others have become more amicable. Now, when it comes to dealing with conflicts, I genuinely and immediately say, “I’m sorry.” The greatest wisdom in resolving conflicts is to admit that I was wrong first. If you are sincere and genuinely apologize, it will relieve your opponent’s mind and no residual hard feelings will remain.
Grateful to be able to say “I’m sorry.”
It wasn’t easy before. My belief in my own judgments was so strong that I never thought I could be wrong, but that was only my point of view. That was how thoroughly I was trapped inside myself, and I was so narrow-minded that I couldn’t understand my opponent’s mind at all. I used to think that if I admitted my mistakes then I had lost, so I tried really hard to justify myself. Indeed, I was foolish. I’m so grateful that I’m now able to say, ” I’m sorry.”
Once, there was some friction while I was talking to a new employee. So I apologized saying, “I was in the wrong and I don’t think I understood your perspective.” Then the employee said, “No, manager. I’ll have to train my mind, too.” I used to be lonely, but now I live receiving the affection of others. I’m grateful and happy that I can work with such good people.
